Family History and Narrative: Integral Coaching

       Through a coaching activity, I found that most clients had commonalities in their coaching topics. Although there are a variety of topics, in nine cases out of ten, they talk about their family issues such as a story about their parents or grandparents and memory with parents. I think that our memories might be inherited from our ancestors and our brains may be highly affected by not only our parents but also more previous generations.

       In terms of neuroscience and psychotherapy, Badenoch (2008) points out that our bodies and limbic region in our brains may not be integrated when we have a psychological issue about family. I’m not a therapist, but no less important is the fact that even most psychologically healthy clients tend to talk about family issues. Why do people tend to talk about family issues even though their coaching topic seems to be irrelevant to family issues? As mentioned above, one presumable reason is that our current memories and brains are highly wired by old memories with family, or it may be possible that our ancestors whom we’ve never met before affect our brains.

       Next, I came up with the following idea: “How can I help my client solve family issues in a coaching session?” In my view, the key is hidden beneath a narrative practice. In an actual session, I attempt to listen carefully to my client’s family story, asking various questions related to it. Surprisingly, during the session, most clients give me a comment like this: “I really feel good right now because I was able to share the story which I usually couldn’t talk about with anybody. Also, I’m surprised that I found a relation between this coaching topic and my family issues.” Many therapists insist that narrative technique is effective for clients because it encourages them to release negative emotions. Based on my experience, however, I suppose that the effect is not only to unleash negative emotions but also to integrate our brains in an appropriate way and to shape a new brain.

Reference

Being a Brain-Wise Therapist: A Practical Guide to Interpersonal Neurobiology